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Image Used: http://www.teamusk.com/images/camel-headlines-gormless-down-at-polls.gifText Used:Gordon Brown's personal popularity ratings have plunged further and faster than any other British prime minister since polling began in the 1930s. Brown's personal ratings, which have fallen from plus 48 last August to minus 37, on a zero midpoint scale."The collapse is the most dramatic of any modern-day prime minister, worse even than Neville Chamberlain who in 1940 dropped from plus 21 to minus 27 after Hitler's invasion of Norway," the latest YouGov poll in the Sunday Times said.My Boobs and Butt Crack Me Up and Down The PoleConfessions From a Confused PoliticianHistorically, prime ministers are often referred to as Primus inter pares, a Latin term translated as first among equals, equals among peoples, and which reflects the original concept of a prime minister as merely the first minister or most senior minister to the monarch, not the dominant or presiding minister, a role later assumed by many prime ministers in many states.
Image Used: http://www.teamusk.com/images/camel-headlines-browne-pants.gifText Used:Human rights laws do apply "to some degree" to British soldiers in combat, Defence Secretary Des Browne has said. His comments come after a ruling by the High Court that means sending troops into action without proper kit could breach their human rights. Defence Secretary Des BrowneDes; every brick (even the unsupported ones) has its day!"These," he said, "are the walls of Sparta, every man is a brick."
Malta for Low Cost Self Catering Holiday Apartments and Budget Flight OptionsDIY or Build Your Own holiday solutions have increased in popularity due to low cost airfares and flexible accommodation bookings. Large families often find their budget stretched to breaking point when using a traditional travel agent to book a holiday during high season and school holidays.
Image Used:http://www.teamusk.com/images/camel-headlines-gormless-naked-mortgage-man.gifText Used:Your mortgage in this man's pockets!An emperor who cares too much about clothes hires two swindlers who promise him the finest suit of clothes from the most beautiful cloth. A small child cries out, "But he has nothing on!" The crowd realizes the child is telling the truth and begins laughing. Ministers and treasury advisors are due to meet with representative of the Council of Mortgage Lenders (CML) to see what UK banks can do to alleviate the mortgage situation.Labour MP George Mudie told Channel 4's News at Noon "I do not think the government are really up to date with how dangerous the housing situation is becoming, and housing finance," he said. The Gormless One, however, holds his head high and continues the procession to financial ruin for hundreds of Britains already struggling to pay their mortgage."Let them pay with cake, bread's to expensive"
Text Used in Headline: The new UK Statistics Authority comes into existence today (April Fools Day 2008). It is an independent body, with powers and the obligation to promote, improve, and safeguard official statistics across the UK. Its aim is to rebuild public trust in Government statistics.There is a general perception that statistical knowledge is all-too-frequently intentionally misused, by finding ways to interpret the data that are favourable to the presenter. A famous saying attributed to Benjamin Disraeli is, "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics." And Harvard President Lawrence Lowell wrote in 1909 that statistics, "like veal pies, are good if you know the person that made them, and are sure of the ingredients.""About time" was the immediate reaction from The Tea Musk Times, "Statistics quoted by politicians and political pressure groups are often heavily weighted in favour of their own prejudices and agendas.If this new drive for honesty and openness can be really believed on "April Fools Day"... TMT gives its full support and will watch closely how things progress".Image Used in Headlinehttp://www.teamusk.com/images/teamusk-headlines-pigs-can-fly.gifFull Press Release and Other Information at AskJackFreedom of UK Public Statistics From Political Pressure
News >> European Destinations and Places of Interest
DIY or Build Your Own holiday solutions have increased in popularity due to low cost airfares and flexible accommodation bookings. Large families often find their budget stretched to breaking point when using a traditional travel agent to book a holiday during high season and school holidays.Low Cost Airlines Tricks and TipsRyan Air now operate a daily flight service direct to Malta flying out from Luton Airport. Although the headline price is never actually the final price; Ryan Air still have probably the lowest prices and convenient timings for direct flights to and from Malta.The main problem is trying to match departure and return dates for best value when booking with a budget airline. Many hotels in Malta will only accept seven or fourteen days room bookings, particularly in high season. The budget airlines know this and seem to adjust their prices to suit. This means you can probably get a very cheap outward flight, but a much more expensive return ticket.It is often better to extend your stay for say, eight or nine days rather than the traditional seven. In this way you'll get the best value for money when booking a budget airline ticket.Best Value for Money - Self Catering Holiday Apartments in MaltaThe Falcon Court Holiday and Long Stay Self Catering Apartments, Bugibba, Malta provide a perfect solution for flexible holiday dates and excellent value for money. YOU CAN MAKE SIGNIFICANT SAVINGS BY CONFIGURING BUDGET FLIGHT DATES WITH DAILY RATE SELF CATERING APARTMENTS http://www.holiday-apartments-malta.co.uk/
Headline Image: http://www.teamusk.com/images/camel-headlines-gormless-back-benched.gifHeadline Text:In television footage, the Queen can be heard saying to Princess Anne: "The prime minister got lost. He disappeared the wrong way...(up his own arse?) at the crucial moment." Conservative leader David Cameron and Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg were also at the banquet in St George's Hall at Windsor Castle. The prime minister and French President were among 150 guests binging out on a four course meal washed down with vintage wine and champagne. The wine list included a Chateau Margaux, Premier Grand Cru Classe, 1961 and a 1982 Krug champagne. There's been no comment (yet) from "Health Britain" (an exclusive pressure group determined to destroy any joy left in living) regarding the damage to the livers and possible alcoholic tendencies of the three "great" leaders of the main political parties.Who Stole MY Spine? Spineless, gormless and pissed is this really a sober Britain?